No doubt you have heard the expression “buyers are liars.” Every sales professional has a list of favorite whoppers they have heard from customers. As competition heats up in the marketplace, it seems that the truth is often replaced by corporate doublespeak. Without further ado, and with credit to Guy Kawasaki for inventing this format, I present the top 10 lies of buyers along with their true meaning:
1. “Your competition is offering me a better deal.” Sometimes this is true but hey, if the deal was really good why didn’t you take it? Translation: Give me a lower price and I’ll lie on my back and let you rub my belly. (Sorry for the bad visual!)
2. “The product never worked right from the start.” In other words, I’ve changed my mind and want to return your product. There’s nothing really wrong with it but I want to blame you instead of looking like a dithering idiot.
3. “Our volume is going through the roof and we need a better deal.” Based on one or two big orders, mister big stuff now wants a lower price. Just as soon as you drop the price, his orders will start tanking.
4. “We’re looking for a supply partner.” Translation: We’re hoping to find someone submissive who we can abuse for special favors, low prices and additional services. Want to become our supplier bitch?
5. “You’re still in the running for the contract.” You are absolutely toast but we haven’t finalized the deal with your competitor yet so we need to keep you warm just in case.
6. “The packaging was damaged when the product arrived.” We accidentally ran over it with our fork truck but we’re not owning up to something dumb like that. Send us a new one.
7. “The product doesn’t meet specification.” We cooked up a new CAD drawing to try and weasel out of the purchase agreement.
8. ”If you give us 90 day terms, we’ll pay in full after the IPO.” Successful start-ups often drop their loyal suppliers when they hit the big time. Most start-ups just don’t succeed. So in the unlikely event that a VC finances us, you’ll get paid.
9. “We’re looking to optimize our supply chain.” We’re looking to drop you like a hot rock and buy direct from your supplier.
10. “We don’t pay finance charges.” We are slow payers or total deadbeats so we now have a policy for all of our suppliers who charge for overdue invoices. We don’t pay the invoices either.
Bonus. “I used to be in sales but I prefer the buying side.” I couldn’t sell so they fired my ass and this is the only job I could find.
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